Wednesday, May 31, 2017

My proposal was personal.

We were watching another one of those shows. You know. The type where a guy goes all out to propose to his girlfriend. She turned to me and said in an off-hand comment that she wished I had done more. She has said it before and I am sure it is not really a regret but more of an announcement that she wanted my proposal to be more public for us to brazenly tell the world that we are in love and we will be together forever.

And I get that, I really do. There is some stigma about showing off to the world an exclamation of love. It is a reality drama thing. But that is not my thing. I took her out to a nice dinner and we spent a lot of one on one time together. Then I took her back to my dorm room where the lighting was low and the place was quiet. I had a card that distracted her while I got down on one knee and asked the question. It was just us.


Nothing grand and nothing over the top.

Weeks before that night I Prayed to the good Lord. I promised that I would love her and keep her for the rest of my life. We would become one flesh as the Bible puts it and God would look over us as we fulfilled our roles in our union. As far as I was concerned, we were married as of that moment. I had taken it to the Lord and made my promise. All I had to do is ask her if she would do the same. A ceremony and signing a paper are just formalities.

I wanted it to be just us. To me, our marriage would always be just us. I knew that when all the hoopla was over and all the guests were gone, it would be her and me. And, that was the way I wanted to start our life together. I wanted her to know that I wanted her as my wife not as a way to show off to others ( although I do) or as a trophy or show. I wanted her as my wife because she blessed me every day with her commitment, kindness, and love towards me. I wanted her to know that we, together, make our marriage, not other people and their ideas and thoughts. Just us. Our marriage was a marriage of just us.

So, in a dorm room with soft lighting in the quiet still night, I laid my mind, heart, and soul bare to ask her to be my wife. Even though I was nervous and shaking, I was confident that she would say yes because she was my blessing for being faithful. She is my proof of a Loving God. And she said yes.

I know that I can have some nontraditional ways of doing and thinking of these sorts of things but this was right and the right way for me. It fit what I feel our marriage is. It is us, through thick and thin. No fan fair or over-the-top show. Our story of faithfulness and dedication and selfless love is our thing. Who needs to be so extravagant with that kind of love?

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