Too crazy for me.
I am a twin.
Yeah I know, right? The number of times that I have heard the
phrase – “There’s two of you?!” have riddled my life for decades. It is not
funny just to tell you. I am me and my brother is . . . well not me. Being a
twin is not really great material for being a comedian thank you very much.
Being a twin is for the most part full of pros and cons. Mostly cons but I am
not being objective now am I? We are
fraternal twins which helps since no one really can tell we are twins unless we
let them in on it. We are night and day. This goes also with the whole
girlfriend thing too. Where I was hopelessly single and Friend Zoned, my
brother had a steady girlfriend in high school. Of course it was not all
holiday either.
My brother had a girl friend that dominated his high school
years. Boy did I learn a lot by watching this one unfold. She was a petite
little girl probably not even 5 feet tall. She had hazel eyes with glasses and
light brown straight hair that was cut to just above the shoulders. She had a slight
lisp when she talked which made her voice and the way she talked always remind
me of how a toddler would speak. She was pretty smart making decent grades. On
all accounts she was cute. She was adorable really.
I know I am forgetting something though. Let me see. . . I am
trying to put my finger on it. Oh, yeah! And she was psycho.
At first, I really didn’t pay attention to the whole brother
having a girlfriend thing other than he had one and I did not. I was not one to really be
bothered by it other than the fact that I really could have used one. I was
doing the whole ignoring so that I didn’t focus on pathetic me all
girlfriendless and lonely thing. As time went on though he began to show signs
that all was not going well. As it turns out, this girl was quite a piece of work.
First of all, she was an emotional game player and she had
all of the trump cards when it came to my brother. Saying he was being
controlled would have been an understatement. She was a puppeteer and he was
just dangling on her strings. She would take hold of his emotions and mold them as
if they were clay into what she wanted, crush it flat and reshape it into
something new. She put him on a roller coaster that was soaring up and then
would do a death drop into the pools of tears he shed only to whip him back and
forth along sharp turns and endless track.
Getting the picture? She was a crazy woman.
The most favorite game this girl would like to play is to get
mad at him and break up about a week or two before a holiday of some sort. Then
after letting my brother wallow in sorrow and shame for a week, she would make
amends (usually with some compensation from him) and all will be back on track just in time for the holiday coming up. Imagine
that! At first I thought it was humorous to see him all taken in like that but
after a year or two, it became a bit sad. Well, pathetic. What makes girls, or
guys even, do stuff like that? Is it some kind of skewed view of romance? I
just have no idea where it all comes from because I have seen this kind of
thing a lot.
I know one thing; there was no way that I would let any girl
do that to me. I decided very quickly that if I called it quits with a girl, or
she called it quits with me, that would be it. I have held to that since I have
decided, not that I was making the choice that much anyway. I was never going
back. The whole trampoline thing was just too stupid for my liking. Since then,
I am sure of this one fact. If a couple calls it quits once, I have never seen
it work out if they give it another go. There was something that causes it to
fail and it would fail again. I am not saying it can’t but I was not going to
fall into a trap like that.
There is even more that made this girl straight up cray cray
– she was on the lookout for another man when she was not around my brother.
She even made passes at me. I didn’t really care for this because not many
other girls seemed interested in me like that and . . . well . . . she was seeing my
brother. Honest to goodness, this girl got a job where I worked and she was
definitely trying to get me to notice her. She even went so far as to tell me
to “give her a chance.” Cha, right! First, you treat my brother like a bouncy
house in which you can bounce out and back in at your will. Then you are not
being committed to your relationship. And on top of all that – you are still
crazy! Seriously. Needless to say, I really was not comfortable around her. She
was a whole book on what not to date. Looking back on it now, I think it is
obvious that she was not really sure of what she wanted.
I don’t remember what caused my brother to stop seeing her
but he finally came to his senses. As for me, I learned so much of what I would
never want out of a relationship that it would impact my dating perspective for
life. Really, she was psycho. It is amazing what you can learn from someone else’s
problems. I didn’t even have to be in this relationship to learn a lot from it.
Most of the time I was thinking that hell would freeze over before I let a girl
do that to me.
In case you are wondering, my brother had wizened up after
that and is now happily married with three daughters that are beautiful and
bright. His wife is a great woman who is intelligent and good for him.
And she doesn’t make passes at me ***wink***
As an end note, I believe that this girl is not this way anymore. Let me make this clear. She is not that way anymore. I am also positive that some who may read
this will know who I am referring to (if you know me and my brother). It would
not be fair of me or those who read this to have this view of her now - over 20 years from when this all happened. Time
has a habit of turning people straight and life will inevitably teach its own
hard lessons. I am sure that we all can look back at our youth and think – man
I am glad I grew out of that stage! Or – I sure was a different person so long
ago. Everyone changes and grows into the person they are now. She was definitely
not for my brother when they dated all those years ago and basically, that is
all I really have to say other than I learned a lot about how I didn’t want my
relationships to be. This post is just to add another layer to my search and
path to my wife. I feel that it was an important piece to the puzzle.
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